5 Reasons why making sense of your difficult emotions matters
We all experience a wide range of emotions in our daily lives, whether we choose to tune into them or not. We tend to notice when we’re feeling ‘positive’ emotions such as happiness, joy or love. But many of us have a tendency to block out our ‘negative’ emotions,...
What your unhelpful habits say about you.
We all like to feel that we’re in control of what happens to us and how we behave. But very often there are things we seem to do over and over. Even though we know they’re not helpful, we can’t seem to stop. Once you realise where these unhelpful habits really come...
The biggest lie you need to stop believing to be more confident.
Life would be much easier and more fun if we were blessed with abundant confidence in all areas of our lives. But it seems that life blesses some people with natural confidence and others are left wanting to be more confident. We might look at people who appear...
Why your ‘failure’ is essential.
On some level we all want to learn and grow, be a “good person” and feel happy as often as possible. That’s not too much to ask the Universe is it? But there’s a whole load of layers, not to mention potential messiness in that description. Because first of...
How breaking the rules around crying is good for your mental health
From when we are very small many of us learn that shedding tears for emotional reasons is ‘bad’. We’re told to ‘get a grip’ and ‘pull it together’ if we’re seen to be crying in public. We’ve developed internalised ‘rules’ around crying. These come from both our...
7 Questions you should ask yourself if you “Need a holiday”
As soon as Christmas is over it seems, we’re inundated with holiday adverts on TV and in the media to entice us away. The lure of a holiday, to ‘get away from it all’, is so appealing, especially after the pandemic. We all could do with a break after the two years of...
How catastrophe could turn out to be your saviour
Most of us go through our days trying to be happy, healthy and living the best life we can. We avoid conflict and drama, and try to forget those past times in our life that were difficult. But sometimes life conspires to bring us face to face with those things that...
What is complex PTSD?
There are things that happen within our own families and communities that have a long term negative impact. And it’s those things that go on unseen, over many years, that can have a devastating effect on the lives of people who experience them.
Let me introduce you to something called complex PTSD.
The real reason behavioural therapy isn’t working for you.
When you know you’re not coping well with everyday life, you might decide to try behavioural therapy. You might have heard great things about it, and been recommended to try ‘CBT’ (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy). You might have many weeks or months of therapy but it still doesn’t seem to make any difference. You do your therapy ‘homework’, yet still feel uncomfortable in some situations.
If therapy isn’t working, you might start to question whether there is any hope for you. Well, I want to reassure you, and give you some clarity about what’s actually going on.
There is a good reason why behavioural therapy isn’t working for you if you’ve experienced trauma.
What counts as traumatic experience?
We’re surrounded by news reports about the tragic things that happen in our world. War, catastrophic floods, hurricanes wiping out entire villages. These things are so devastating we call them ‘traumatic’. We understand that word ‘trauma’ to mean something BIG. ...
The deeper meaning hidden in your intense reactions
If you prefer your life to be simple and uncomplicated, welcome to the club! We all want a straightforward life, where everything makes sense. A life where what happens to us and how we respond is predictable and safe. But for some of us, it doesn’t happen like...
How to cope when you feel abandoned.
The world is often a difficult place to navigate. People say and do hurtful things to each other. Sometimes by accident, and sometimes on purpose. Even those people who should love and support us can sometimes neglect their ‘duty of care’. We can feel bruised and...
Signs you may have trauma and not know about it.
It might surprise you to know that many people find 'everyday' situations difficult.‘Ordinary’ situations like attending a meeting at work. Even ordering coffee in a cafe, or driving the kids to school can cause extreme discomfort in some people. If you’re one of...
How to deal with rejection – top tips from a professional actor.
One of the big things that binds us together as human beings is our innate fear of rejection. This fear can impact what we do, who we speak to and the opportunities that we say Yes or No to. How we deal with rejection (or the fear of potential...
Crying needs to be normalised!
Most of us have had experiences when we were young of being told “Big boys/girls don’t cry” “Don’t be scared” ‘Wipe away those tears and put on a smile!’ And as we get older that phrasing might change to “Cheer up, it’s not that bad” “Pull yourself together”...
The truth about self-awareness and sensitivity and why you should care.
If you’ve ever experienced going to a networking event, and being the odd one out because everyone else knows each other - you’ll understand what it feels like to be excluded. If you’ve ever stood up to speak in public, and felt your throat go dry and your palms...